Leading from Love - Leadership part 1

I’d put off writing this one. It’s about leadership, and when it came down to it, I always wondered, “who wants to hear my thoughts on leadership?”

Then I thought more about it. And while this is going to sound very self-serving, I’m a pretty great leader. My life has evidence of this placed throughout it, even if I’ve tried to discount those things.

Then there have also been things happening lately that made me spend more time thinking about what makes a good leader.

So, here you go. About a third of you have asked for this, and I’m in the mind space tonight to write it.

This is part 1 of a few.

The other post on leadership talks about how I lead. The question on leadership I get the most is, “What makes a good leader?”

It will come as no surprise to most of you that, for me, the greatest example of leadership is Jesus. That’s why the way I lead is bound to my faith.

Beyond Jesus are other examples. I’ve had the pleasure and honor of working with and for some great leaders. My current direct leader is an excellent example of that. Not just because he’s going to read this, but in part, because he believes in supporting me in the things I do, like reading this.

That’s a big thing that most leaders forget about.

Yet, we can learn a ton from bad leaders as well. But that is for a different post. For now, we will focus on the question I’ve been asked.

First, we shouldn’t strive to be a “good” leader. If we’re going to lead, we need to be great at it. Those we lead deserve that.

I follow a guy named Andy Frisella. I’m not going to say I agree with everything he says, but there is quite a lot that I do. If you look him up, you need to know there is cursing and a lot of blunt truth. I don’t mind the former and seek the latter. It doesn’t bother me, but it may you.

Anyway, there was a podcast I was listening to, and he said something that many leaders forget.

Those we lead don’t work for us. We work for them.

If we look at what Jesus did, He wasn’t leading people for his own needs. He led them to better their lives and offered them things nobody else could.

We need the people we lead. We should be leading so that we are serving them and not making them serve us.

The first point of great leadership is that. Lead for and with a purpose of serving those you lead and the purpose you all have. In my life, that purpose is my faith. I’m blessed to have that as my job as well. But even if I didn’t work for a ministry, that will always be the true north on my compass.

This leads me to the next point. We need to ensure that the purpose we are leading with and towards encompasses all of those we are leading.

Too often, people will lead from a place of self. That limits the reach that the goals and purposes have. If I go to the various teams I lead in my life and say that we are doing something just because it is something I want to have happen, they’re going to call me out on it as they should.

We need to make our goals and purposes expansive enough that each person knows the part they are playing. We also need to listen to the people we lead and be honest with them about what we’re doing and why.

Jesus was very honest and clear about His goals and what He called His Apostles to do. Yet, those goals, His purpose, expanded beyond just Him, and those He led knew, believed, and were passionate about that.

In summary, make sure you consider and include even the most junior level in those goals and purposes you have. If you don’t, then you will fail in the long run.

Next is truth. We must speak the truth if we are going to be great leaders.

I don’t know anyone that hasn’t had the experience of seeing a leader or having a leader, not speaking the truth to them.

When this happens, it not only discourages those we lead, but it drives them away from us and, more importantly, the purpose that we’re trying to achieve.

It’s no secret that Jesus spoke the truth in everything. His example of speaking truth is critical. He didn’t speak truth to boast or shock. He spoke the truth because it was right, even if it distanced people from Him.

He spoke the truth because he knew it was needed and because He valued us more than He did Himself.

If we lead from a place that isn’t truth-based, we will create dissension and distrust and find ourselves left alone with nothing but those truths we should have shared.

That brings us to valuing those we lead more than ourselves.

This one is hard for a lot of people. Let’s face it, many “leaders’ are an egotistical lot.

They believe that it’s about being heard rather than listening. About themselves and not about others. Their ideas are the ones that matter, not the ideas of those that do the work.

None of these are good.

Great leaders don’t only do the things we’ve covered, but they value others more than themselves. You see this in business, parenthood, marriage, faith, and more.

We shouldn’t lead with our egos.

Great leaders are the last to speak in a meeting. They’re the last to take praise but the first to take the blame.

They listen more than they speak, but that doesn’t mean they don’t speak when it’s needed.

They make the hard decisions and have the hard conversations with the greater good and value of others as the center.

They don’t ask more from the people they lead than they are willing to do themselves.

Jesus offered, and offers, a goal of salvation for all. He loved others so much more than himself that He died for them.

We need to value others so that it is evident to them and evident to anyone who sees them and how they are led.

We should value others more than ourselves. It isn’t easy for those led by ego, and for those people, leadership in its true sense will be a challenge.

You can force people to do things, but those people will leave.

That’s the difference between people who genuinely lead from a selfless place and those who lead from a selfish place.

Leadership isn’t a title, office, or position. Leadership is a privilege given to us by others.

When it’s selfish, you must force people to do things. People question what they and you are doing. They don’t know the purpose because that purpose is you. That’s toxic.

But if people know you truly value them more than you do yourself and are willing to stand for them before yourself, you will find that it becomes an unstoppable force.

That’s what love does. It takes the pieces of things that are alone and brings them together with a unified purpose. We should always lead from a place of love.

Love for our people, love for our purpose, and love for what we’re doing.

If you aren’t leading from love, what is it that you’re leading for?